Habits vs Routines- What's the real story

Previously we briefly talked about habits on our blog, looking at the science behind habits. Note sure what post I'm talking about? Click here to see the post.

With a new year usually it means we have new plans and intentions for the year, which can include making new habits! But let's be real, making new habits can be daunting and really hard. Sometimes we don't even know where to begin, never mind learning how to make them stick.

Okay, we get it. Deep breath. It is possible to get through this, and we can do it. Let's start by breaking habits down and taking it one step at a time.

What are habits?
Habits are small decisions you make and actions you perform every day. Did you know that habits actually account for 40% of our behaviours? So basically you are a sum of your habits, good or bad.

Habits basically help form the person you are today, the things you believe, and the personality type you portray to everyone else. So they are a pretty big deal and are something we should spend more time examining. Do we like our habits? Do they make us happy? Are there things we would like to change?

Habits are a type of learning. They work by creating an impulse to do a behaviour with little to no thought. Think about it this way: the steps to washing your hands comes to us as an adult to little or no thought. But have you tried teaching a 2 year old? It requires a lot more thought and memorization. This is because this process for the 2 year old has not become a habit yet.

Habits are usually considered to be more automatic behaviours (requires little to no thinking) and often result in a payoff, such as feeling good when we engage in the behaviour.

Habits vs. Routine
If you haven't noticed, habits are a hot topic. There are thousands of self help books videos, and other resources just dedicated to the art and science of habits. It's a heck of a lot. And the idea of building habits is very appealing, hence why it's so marketable. I mean who wouldn't want to simply make a habit out of doing things like exercise, journaling, paying bills, and so forth?

But with the definition above of the idea of it requiring little to no thought, it then suggests that only certain behaviours can then become a habit. Anything that requires concentration, intention, or extended effort, by definition are not habits.

This is where a lot of us get caught up and then become frustrated with ourselves. We may have focused on creating a habit out of something that might not have the ability to become a habit. But if they aren't a habit, what are they?

Enter the word routine. Not familiar with it? I'm sure you are. Routines are a sequence of actions regularly followed.

"Habits are a type of routine, but not all routines become habits."

 Routines generally require conscious thought and at times can feel uncomfortable to do. The magic of habit making sells this idea that we can take unfun tasks like folding laundry and turn them into tasks that are on auto-pilot. Has anyone mastered this turning into a habit? I doubt it, because the truth is if some fairy came down and said they would fold our laundry for us all the time, I feel like 9 out of 10 of us would jump at this opportunity. This is a routine.

With a habit, we feel uncomfortable when we don't get a chance to do it. If our hands got dirty from something, habit tells us to wash our hands. If the water stopped working halfway through washing our hands, we would feel strange or uncomfortable not being able to finish that task, even if some fairy told us that it was okay, we don't have to wash our hands. It would take some of us sometime to undo the idea of washing our hands after they get dirty if a fairy were to always clean them for us. This is a habit.

So how can we form a habit?
Start first with understanding is what your trying to do truly a habit, or a routine? Once we start distinguishing if we are able to form this behaviour into a habit or routine, then we can start to move forward.

1. Start to set time aside to do the task. And get specific about this guys. Look at our calendar and decide "How many days will I do it a week, what days in the week will I do it, and how long will I do it during the session?". Without dedicating time in your calendar to do your task, it's really hard to get it done. 
2. Set up small triggers to remind you to stay on task and stay organized. If you want to start working out in the morning have your workout clothes already set up and within eye sight. Maybe do other things like have your playlist set up so you don't get side tracked, have a water bottle ready to go, and if you need that morning coffee set up a timer to start your machine so it's ready to go. 
3. Expect & welcome discomfort. Learning new behaviours requires effort, and there is going to be times that you will have to push through some tough lack of motivation. But fear not, there are so many coping strategies out there to help you through this. Some can include re-imaging a negative into a positive by telling yourself a different story (i.e. every time you sweat at the gym or feel a burn, tell yourself this is a sign you are getting stronger), practicing mindfulness, or even just having someone help you be accountable. 
4. Speaking of accountability, this is a huge one that can be a step all on its own. And the beauty of technology is that if we don't have someone who can physically keep us accountable, we do have other options. We can be a part of online groups/forums where you participate in chats and video chats. Or else you can use technology to help as well, setting up reminders for you. Another great thing is to continually mark down your progress. Maybe in the thick of things it doesn't feel like you're making progress, but if you see things in black and white it would be much harder to argue against it and it can be more motivating.  
5. Remember to accept. Be gentle with yourself. Don't expect to do something new every day and to keep up with this. Start small and work your way up as it becomes less daunting. Don't push behaviours to become a habit, if it's only meant to be a routine. Sometimes even habit making is best done by starting it off as a routine and then it naturally becoming a habit. 

At the end of the day it's all about YOU and what's going to work for you. Experiment around a bit and do some research into things. Different things work for different people. Give your routines a chance and tweak it as you go along. And celebrate all your wins! Even the smallest ones. It's not easy, but the fact that you are trying is HUGE. 

You go Glen Coco, you got this. 

Resources
https://jamesclear.com/habits
https://www.nirandfar.com/habits/
https://theliterarysalon.com/uncategorized/is-it-a-habit-or-a-routine